Christmas spirit?

So what happened in these last few days? Well not much. Last night I had to give up on my charming neighbor who texted me in a very polite but "read-between-the-lines" way. It hurts mesince it was a non-online date in a long time.
I've also seen my ex. sbhe was sitting in a car and the only topic was the money she owes me and she keeps on not sending me. So bootom line: she's with somebody else, I'm historyand by the way, merry christmas!
I feel so down. Why do I have this feeling I'm paying for something? I don't find it fair (but fairness has nothing to do with that) that she's with somebdoy and I'm just being single, trying my best to meet someone but failing miserably.
I need time. Time and somebody else to get over it and her. Let's look a the bright side: I have plenty of time.

?

Welcome to the show! I'm M., a French guy who's 34 and now single. Everything is falling down and I'm trying to put the remaining parts of my so-called sentimental life together. Welcome to my Messy Life!